Severed

There has to be almost a thousand people in the room, yet he feels more alone than ever.  Looking around at the smiling faces, both genuine and forced, at the laughter of women and men, old and ever young, he understands what it is all supposed to portray.  But he does not connect.  He never connects.  Whatever tenuous threads might have existed in some distant past have long since been severed.  Perceived toughness, even heroism, is nothing more than other people's desire, their primal need, to project something, anything, on to the empty shell of his emotions.  They fear the dark and silent vacuum that truly resides inside him without even knowing that it exists.

Once again he seeks out the deliberate and time-worn mental switch; the mask appears.  He enters in to the crowd and nobody suspects.

Tea is Making Me Nauseous

This country is completely, totally insane.

At this point I am fully expecting President Palin in 2012 just because people apparently have no mind of their own. They bow to whatever the media feels is the money making story, accepting it as the real majority.

It only comes down to one thing:  eyeballs on webpages, newspapers and news channels, and ears on radio stations.  Whatever gets the most will be what gets force-fed to us. 

Sanity has left the building.

Thankuverramuch.

[Listening to "Citizen Erased" - Muse]

Shattered

Sometimes when you think the world is crashing down around you, it's just the sound of the glass walls of your cage.

[listening to: "True Faith" by New Order]

Mr. Big Nose

Mr. Big Nose, originally uploaded by ThomasWalker.

Smells like good things are going on. Just need to keep an eye on the pot until it's all done.

[listening to: "Map of the Problematique" - Muse]

See it through

Never give up on something you care about.

Never stop fighting for what you believe in.

You are stronger than you feel.

You have more control than you think.

See it through to the end.

This, then, applies to us all, especially now.

Not really a political post

I just want to comment on the fact that the Dems have apparently had their spines ripped out by losing a single senate seat.

1)  If the loss of that one seat was so important to passing a health care bill, why wasn't the election taken way WAY more seriously?

2) With the loss now a matter of record, it is pathetic that the Dems go scampering away from the health care bill like mice when the light's turned on because of one missing vote.  Way to stick to your guns you pansies!

A person in my position would really have liked to seen a health care bill pass..IF ONLY to prove that change can in fact happen.  Sure it will get changed again next year and probably stoned to death when the equally spineless GOP regains their power, but the fact of getting done was something important that needed to happen.

Now we will just wallow in the stagnation of 40 years of no change and extremely bad practices that are the accepted norm.

I am sick and tired of will-less, spineless whimpering fools running the country.

That is all.

Time to be real

The last couple years have, to put it bluntly, sucked.  Now that I am pulling ahead of the fog and the darkness I find myself questioning some fundamentals, and also preparing myself for maybe some new realities.

These are things I want, things that are good and will be good for me.  Some day maybe I can tell you about them.

But not now, not yet.

"This above all: to thine own self be true" - Bill Shakespeare

[listening to "Bliss" - Muse]

All along you must have known

Anything worth having comes with a price to pay.

I decided earlier this year...or maybe it was late last year...that I wasn't going to let life pass me by anymore. I thought to myself, "self, you need to seize opportunities no matter how slim the chance or how difficult the task or how high the cost. If the choice is between trying now or regretting not trying forever, then there is no choice."

So, while not many of these opportunities have presented themselves thus far, I am still living by this credo.  I am hoping that it works in my favor in 2010.

I'm feeling a bit better about things close to me.  The world is still a giant ball of crap, but to be honest I can't really worry about that too.  Until I need to fly somewhere and the TSA snaps on the rubber glove, I need to keep my sphere of concern limited to more immediate and personal matters.

Things that make me happier. Or at least less sad.

I've been smiling a lot more.  This is a Very Good Thing.

[listening to "Good + Bad Times" - INXS]

Tutalemma

I've been staring at this photo for a while now. It's such a vivid representation of how something most people wouldn't think twice about is actually much more intricate and fascinating than you would suppose. And this annalemma includes the sun in total eclipse - hence the name tutalemma.

Click on the photo to go to the original APOD page with explanations and copyrights.